Script For McCain Ad

Longtime readers of this blog know I despise John McCain and do not want him to become President. But here's an idea for a McCain ad, that illustrates a point. A rough draft:

Plain background, John McCain speaking to the camera: In 2000, George W. Bush won the Presidency because he ran a better campaign than Al Gore. Whether or not Bush actually won that election legitimately, the sad fact is that if Gore wasn't such a pompous ass it shouldn't have even been close.

In 2004, George W. Bush was re-elected, despite having one of the worst records of a first-term President ever. And that's because, again, he and his operatives ran a better campaign than did John Kerry, whose biggest downfall was being John Kerry. Even if you believe Ohio and the Electoral College was stolen for Bush, no one disputes that Bush won the popular vote in yet another election in which he should have been trounced.

Don't you wish, in retrospect, that Gore had defeated Bush? Or that Kerry had defeated Bush?

Don't we all?

What does that say about these campaigns?

Barack Obama has run a better campaign than me. He's ahead in the polls. He comes across as more likable than me, which is why I was hoping Hillary would be nominated - I'm more likable than she is.

But remember that Bush was more likable than Gore, who had a wealth more knowledge and experience. And Bush, despite showing signs of dementia, still came across as more likable than Kerry.

So let's concede that Obama is a better campaigner and more likable than me. What does that say? I'm still more experienced, and I think I'm pretty smart and knowledgeable.

Indeed, our entire country is screwed up because victory goes to the people with the more attractive personalities and more effective campaign ads, not to the people with experience and competence.

So vote for me, John McCain. I may be a horrible campaigner, but I would make a great President.

Show McCain photo, with generic deep-voice male voiceover Vote John McCain, because since Obama seems to be better, he's probably worse.

McCain voiceover: I'm John McCain and I think this message sucked and will backfire, which is all the more reason to vote for me.

My point? Election campaigns rarely have to do with electing the right person, and more to do with fooling enough people. I'm suggesting this commercial for McCain because it would at least get to this truth.